sand in my sweater: isabelle

it's midnight. i have work in the morning. and i'm still writing this. i really don't understand my blogging habits and i'm never sure how i haven't given up not writing about my blogging spontaneity to start most of my 'recent' posts. anyway!

i recently returned from a homecoming in seattle, only to lock away some of my favorite days in my life (although there are many, but they aren't every day). to ensue: more journal-esque photos and erin-ish writing of my five-day seattle summer (i was going to say sappy writing, then would have edited that to broody writing, then darkly humorous writing, then i just went for erin writing. whether or not you agree with any of those adjectives, i guess you'll have to accept the fact that i write my writing.) for the moment, in order to quench both my desire for rebellious late night blogging/test my morning abilities to stay sane, and your itch to know something about erin's modern life: some photos of someone you might call a chum from my chum bucket. 

7am. alki beach. good old seattle, washington.

to be continued (with photos of isabelle avec erin)...

call it what you want - foster the people

a post for a toast to seattle: finally

i knew i was moving for good for a while. so did a lot of other friends. we all knew, but who knew it would hit home until just a few days before leaving.

i'm finally thinking about it. i'm imagining myself sitting at the airport, waiting in line at customs, sitting at the newsstand place, reading teenvogue. but i wont be, because i'll be remembering seattle rain knocking at my doorstep, car rides and walks with the people who really matter, and even small talks with the people who kind of matter (haha). dont worry about me. dont think i'll be too hyped up about the new life i'll be living because i'll be remembering seattle.

i wont be sleeping during my flight to jersey, i wont even be imagining life ahead, i'll be dreaming of everything that's beautiful in seattle. i'll be half asleep with purple and gold colors flying through my brain, seeing pictures of the good times when i didn't want to be anywhere else, and the bad times when i hated everyone here and cried alone in my closet, trying to figure out who i am above the misconceptions that still haunt me.

i'm imagining myself on the car ride when my bro picks me up from the airport to his house. i'll be talking to him. "so what'd you do before you left seattle?" i'll tell him "just trying to enjoy seattle with my friends for the last times." but i wont be talking to him, i'll be giving him only a sample of everything the last month has meant to me. i'll be trying to ignore the reality that i really have no idea when i'll be in seattle again. i really have no idea when the next time i'll be able to see all the people who shaped me and changed my life. i really have no idea when life will lead me back to washington. but i'm glad it was a part.

i'm imagining myself in new york, in college during orientation. no lie and i'm not gonna hide it; i'm definitely going to have a kick-ass time there. like. i'm not even joking it's gonna be the best thing ever; if you're jealous of me, well i would be too. but i'll be jealous of you too cuz you get to ripen and grow bright green and tall and fruitful where you've always been planted. but moving to a new place doesn't mean i'm starting totally over. i'm being replanted, but this time with seasoning and with some natural hormones that just give the extra boost.

anyway, i'm imagining myself in college. i wont be living a new life. i never will be. i'll be living off the life i've built here. seattle, you mean a lot to me, yeah the space needle is alright and pike place is awesome but mostly, i mean the people i've brushed and embraced shoulders with in high school. some of those people i can't wait to leave, but in a way i'll miss them because sure, they helped me learn that there are suckers and semi-purely evil people in society. (hi!)

i'm imagining myself landing my first internship in new york, graduating, living in an apartment in the city, finding love and finding life. but in this life, did i ever say goodbye to seattle? no. i know things are only going to get better. thank you IHS, thank you chums and washington for an experience that's already embedded in my system. stick around, cuz maybe i'm not really leaving.

love,
erin

p.s. for my seattle friends, feel free to hit me up anytime on facebook or something, you guys really mean a lot to me, if you can't tell. :]

currently loving

A few days ago, I made another trip to the Seattle Art Museum and I laid my eyes upon the "Thermometer" by Jasper Johns and I literally pointed and suddenly said "Jasper Johns!" because the art academy I've been working at (and been having a fab time at the same time) dedicated one of its summer camp projects to Jasper Johns' number art works! So I was like 'hey I know this guy!' Haha. So cool story bro of the day!

Some background info about Mr. Jasper J:

• He's an American contemporary artist. 
• Was highly influenced by Pop Art.
• is known for working with numbers, prints, flags, stenciled words.
• was the first studio artists to receive the Presidential Medal of Freedom (right from the hands of President Obama in February 2011) since Alexander Calder about 35 years ago.  
• Obama said about him: “It has been noted that Jasper Johns’ work, playing off familiar images, has transfixed people around the world...Like great artists before him, Jasper Johns pushed the boundaries of what art could be and challenged others to test their own assumptions. He didn’t do it for fame, he didn’t do it for success—although he earned both...As [Johns] said, ‘I assumed that everything would lead to complete failure, but I decided that it didn’t matter—that would be my life,’”

"Do something, do something to that, and then do something to that."

I'm loving those colorful, consistent yet unexpected lines.

 

"When something is new to us, we treat it as an experience. We feel that our senses are awake and clear. We are alive."

 

 

 "I don't know how to organize thoughts. I don't know how to have thoughts."

 

  

"I have no ideas about what the paintings imply about the world. I don't think that's a painter's business. He just paints paintings without a conscious reason."

 

  "To be an artist you have to give up everything, including the desire to be a good artist."

 This was the painting, Thermometer, I saw at the Seattle Art Museum! Apparently, the thermometer in the middle protests to contemporary beliefs of warm and cool colors. Even as the temperature goes up, cool colors are still up there. So case in point, colors are whatever temperature you want them to be. Go out of bounds! What a rebel you were, Jasper.

looks like i was really excited?

 

 There's the man (he was pretty good lookin' back in the day)

"As one gets older one sees many more paths that could be taken. Artists sense within their own work that kind of swelling of possibilities, which may seem a freedom or a confusion."
- Jasper Johns

song of the moment -
yellow - coldplay (I feel like it's appropriate...)

"We did it!"

I remember when I first learned to ride a bike. A gray cement parking lot in New Jersey. Lit up by a setting sun. On a lazy summer weekday evening. In front of an empty playground--where I remember falling on one of the little ladders, landing on my crotch, not a good day. I can't clearly remember the whole event like a motion picture, but I do reminisce snippets of this monumental moment. Shots of my parents with the biggest grins are the first to pop up. And, most of all, I remember falling on my knee (I guess I just fell a lot by that playground), and all I can remember is that it hurt. a lot.

Today, it hurts--not my crotch, but my heart. Just a few days ago was another monumental day that my parents will oogle about for the rest of their days just as they busted out their embarrassing smiles for me when I trekked a few feet on my wheels without their support. 'I'm off, guys!' I was off to explore the world then and today--I did it. After that day, I was never able to go back and say I didn't know how to ride a back. Now, I'll never be able to say I'm a high school student (now I'm an adult--ew). 

All my life I've built great friendships only to lose them--twice in New Jersey, once in South Korea, and today, once and for all in WA. And now I'm scraping another piece of me, not my knee but my heart--ooo so sappy. Ever since I moved to tree-and-coffee-infested Washington state, I couldn't wait to head back home to the East Coast--Seattle has just been an extremely awkward place for me, but now I feel like Seattle is just as home to me as the East is. I'll have no family here when I go to college, so I don't know when or if I'll ever be on the West Coast again, but one thing is for sure, I'll be repping the Eagles, the purple and gold, and tree-and-coffee-infested Washington forever. 

(there's more at the end of this post, but because you are probably too lazy to read it, here's my effort at a conclusion:) When people are talking about Starbucks and the Mariners and the Seahawks and the Sounders (if people even do outside of WA...), you can count on me to be reppin' the good ol' WA! Whether I see you again, or if you will continue to creep on my blog without me knowing, you have changed my life for the better. God bless and take care. 

As I pick myself up from scraping my heart as I did my knee, it's time to celebrate, yeah, I did it, but I couldn't have done it without everyone I've ever known. And here's just a lil celebration via photos of some amazing people in my life that I hate to part with, but will treasure in my soul 'til I'm over the hill. 

 What I saw on my calendar/wall that morning.

(Yes, I do indeed write messages to myself.)

 I spy with my little eye a short asian girl on the screen at Safeco Field.

 

I cringe at the idea of being an adult, but at that height, who would believe that I am? Woohoo!

This photo comes off as slightly promiscuous but I am simple indulging in my friend's fluffy hair possibly for the last time. Cut me some slack.

As much as I don't like to admit that my mom is great, my mom is great. Thanks for all your support and I will miss your doing my laundry, your homemade food (what am i going to do without Korean BBQ?!?!), for hemming all my clothes and most of all, for being my mom--you are probably creeping on my blog right now, so here's your cameo!

Some miscellaneous photos from the last few days:

At my friend's grad party, I like the boiz.

Hide and seek at Target never gets old.

Photobooth photos from the all-night graduation celebration.

song of the moment -

There have been students that I simply brushed shoulders with every day on the way to the same classes, and others whom I couldn't  imagine my life without; no matter who they are, and if you're reading this, if I ever looked at you, smiled at you, hissed at you, said hi to you, you've made a difference in my life and I want to thank you.

"I've heard it said / that people come into our lives for a reason / bringing something we must learn / and we are led / to those who help us most to grow / if we let them / and we help them in return / Well, I don't know if I believe that's true / but I know I'm who I am today because I knew you...

It well may be / that we will never meet again / in this lifetime / so let me say before we part / so much of me / is made from what I learned from you / you'll be with me / like a handprint on my heart / and now whatever way our stories end / I know you have re-written mine by being my friend..."

photo thanks to Stop Action Photography, Isabelle Chu, and.. a bunch of random people at my high school! ^_^